just a lil somethin'...

Here is just a little something that I popped up and wrote somewhere in the night. Its a rap...cuz that's how I roll...lol. I picture someone like Toby Mac tearin' it up. Well, actually my first image came as (and this is how you know mommy never gets the TV...even though I do like this show) the very talented ventriloquist from Victorious, Robbie Shapiro (Matt Bennett) and his puppet Rex; since on the iParty with Victorious episode where he did a lil rhyme time action, it made me think of him first...laugh now...but seriously how awesome would it be if he actually did rap it for millions of young viewers to hear...see even a puppet can be a powerful pathway to the light of Christ :) Dream BIG people cuz we serve a God with no limits!

Sometimes we go through the fire
but call on God cuz in it he does inspire
Turns me into who he wants me to be
Who in His eyes sees a far greater me.
As I'm going through the test
I must remember to let Him figure out the rest.
Leave it in His very capable hands.
Its not always for me to understand.
I have to let go - hold nothin' back
in my God there isn't anything that I lack.
He has the master mind and plan
so on His solid rock I will stand
and watch it unfold bringing me into new light
faithfully the fight of faith I will fight
to bring others into the kingdom of everlasting love
with a Lord who conquered the grave and rose above.
All He ask is that I do the same
to rise above and bring glory to His powerful name.
Its a little thing for me to give my all
even when I feel unworthy of the call.
But I keep my eyes fully on Him
praying "this little light of mine" never grows dim.
Callin' out "You are the potter and I am the clay,
mold me into Your image this very day."
Let God be the number one thing in me others see
cuz in the end...He is all we really need.

For My Boys

I love being a mom....

I love the cuddle times and giant hugs. I love watching them grow and learn. I love their personalities and seeing them find things they love like: around the time Brayden was born Riley loved two things, hot wheel cars and anything with a steering wheel. I love that every night he would lay in my bed pushing hot wheel cars around until he fell asleep (with Nemo-on VHS- playing in the background on the TV) A few years later he loved non-fiction books; he came home often from the library having checked out these large field guides! Now his love is still for hot wheels (we have a board that I painted years ago with roads and buildings on it they love playing with all the time). He loves LEGOS!! He loves having company over - he is very social and loving. I love his sweet, thoughtful spirit! I love watching him take care of kids younger than him, and always being kind to others- saying sweet things. He loves stuffed-animals. He also loves riding bikes, and he loves wearing those rubber bracelets; has them all way up arm! Brayden...he loves sports and being active! If he can jump, flip, kick, hit, run, throw, catch, and tackle he is happy. He used to love to play dress up all the time; he loved his super hero outfits - Brayden became Batman often! He loves sharks. He loves dogs. It seems the bigger the better with him. He is my mini stuntman. I love his adventurous personality! Right now he loves BASKETBALL! He wanted a basketball notebook so bad the other day so I got it and he actually sat down and wrote a story about basketball in it! His Aunt Misa and Uncle Brandon bought him one of those basketball nets you can hang on a door....you always hear him slam-dunking in his room! I love watching him play sports and be aggressive staying on the ball! He loves music; he will take his ipod and listen to music often; you can hear him singing.
Then comes the dancing!! I love the dancing fun times in our house. We all love to break it down! LOL. I love playing games with my boys...although Brayden and I can be a tad competitive...lol...and they both can actually beat me at chess! At 7 & 9 years old, they are awesome at it! I love just sitting together on the couch watching movies together. I love hearing them quote and laugh about a good movie later....I LOVE HEARING THEM LAUGH!!! I love Riley's dimples appearing as his huge grin brightens my day :) I love the silly things they say that make me smile. I love that they have begun leaving me sweet, surprising notes like I do for them...one day I found a note on my desk saying "have a good day love BK", and I walked over to Brayden to asked if he left me a note; he shyly and sweetly smiled and nodded...I LOVE those moments.

Brayden will reach so many people for the kingdom of God because of his strong will as he will always stand for what he believes in. He doesn't hold back, and then when you don't expect it- his gentleness comes through and melts your heart...Brayden will make a great man of God that will be an example to his his wife and children someday. I LOVE how Riley is so thoughtful and helpful and giving! He is a great young man of God, and will be an amazing husband and father someday because of those special qualities. He will also reach many for Christ because of his love and compassion.

I love how we play eye-spy at dinner every night. I love our prayer times before bed. I used to love wrestling with them...being a single mom I felt I needed to learn to do this because boys will be boys...but now they hurt me so I back down...lol...this is where I am praying for a tag team partner...one who is a strong an amazing man of God, who will lead by example for these two little men I love dearly. I love reading with them and hearing how much they have learned at school...not that boys really like talking much about school, but...I get things out of them every now and then and love hearing it. LOL. I love hearing them sing praise and worship songs. I love that one day I didn't feel good, and I was tucking boys in; I went to give Riley a hug, and when I pulled away he said wait, and hung on for awhile...then he said ok and let go...he said, "I was praying for you."

Have I mentioned....I love being a mom....

And I love talking to my mom about being a mom...thank you mom for being an amazing mom and loving me and supporting me through everything. Moms are very special. Let your mom know it today. If you have suffered the greatest loss I could never imagine...loosing your mom...I am praying for you today...my mom is going through this, and the hurt is unbearable...but I do know that Grandma is with her Creator, her Savior, her King of Kings and Lord of Lords, and she is in a better place. I do know that Christ can bring comfort, and peace, and strength when we need it most. I do know that Christ is the father figure we need to pattern our parenting after...I pray that I am a mother that shows the love of Christ at all times, and always points my boys to the direction of Jesus.

Game Time

Do you ever feel like you just want to quit...just pack it all up and crawl away? (using verb crawl because overwhelming stress and exhaustion does not help with confident posture)

I used to really like playing the game of Life when I was a little kid! (remember that board game? Not sure if they still have it...but it was fun) Now I'm an adult playing the reality version...when did that happen?! Why did I choose the wrong paths at time? How did I get here?

Don't get me wrong...I very much love my life, love being a mom more than anything, and I know I'm blessed....but it's still life....not easy breezy lemon squeezy all the time this we all know...but do we know what to do when things go sour?

We live this verse out with Christ as our strength to do it,

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything with prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving we present our request to God". AND THIS IS THE BEST PART SO PAY ATTENTION! "and the PEACE OF GOD which surpasses all understanding (you know all those things weighing you down = His peace trumps those things) will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus."

My heart was heavy when I began writing this tonight....but He is lifting those things from me, wiping my tears, holding me close, and filling me with peace as I finish this...praying same for you! Love ya :)

Changing Verbs

I have changed some verbs in my life...from searching to waiting. I'm done daily seeking after what I think I want and I'm ready to wait on what God has for me. If it's not what God has for me, it's not gonna be what I really want or need when I get it on my own my own way! I've also went from begging to asking and believing. It works and I'm also left with a peace and confidence. Instead of a tear stained pillow and a headache from all the tantrums of not getting it now! God is doing amazing things in my life and I'm so thankful for His loving correction, His faithfulness, His strength, and His promises, and His peace!

Allow Him to search your heart...maybe some changes need to be made...let Him do the work-you just do the accepting of all He has for you. As you go through the changes it may be tough, or it may be easier than you thought once you just let go. Either way the results are you growing closer into the image of your Creator and a life filled with joy and peace!