Carrying a Mountain

It is 4:30 AM, but I just had to get up and write about the amazing thing Jesus has just done in my life.  I will not go in to any of the specific details because this is very personal, but I would like to share a picture of what He has for me, and I pray as you read this Jesus begins to do the same miracle in your life! I believe without a doubt that if you go to Him and ask, it will be done!

I woke up with weight on my shoulders.  I literally felt like I was carrying a mountain...I began to feel the actual pressure of all that weight pressing me deeper into the couch I was sleeping on.  I couldn't move under the mass of it, I could hardly breathe.  This is a mountain I have been carrying for a long time too, but it became massivly clear to me tonight; the image of it all was so fresh and real that I knew I would be crushed forever if I did not find a way to cast that mountain out of my life.

So, I went with the sweet advice of a new amazing friend.  I spoke with her a day ago about several things, but this major mountain in my life came up as well.  This mountain is so hard to think about, to share, or to face, but her advice was just what I needed- and God knew that :)

Again, I will not go in to details, but bottom line it once again deals with insecurity; one of the Devil's main tools he uses for destruction in my life...and sadly many others.  I write about this often, and I pray every time I write that God uses my story to help others find the answer to victory in this vicious battle against feelings of unworthiness. The only answer is Jesus.  The only way out is to grab on to His hand and allow Him to pull you out of the life-threatening, relentless snares of Satan.

My compassionate friend reminded me once again to find my worth in Jesus. She gently reminded me of the unfailing love of Jesus.  She told me to climb into His lap and allow Him to brush His hands through my hair and calm my soul. These are the powerful words she spoke to me that I speak to you now as well...and some may think this is corny, or unrealistic, or pointless to even try- but I am telling you it is vital to your victory!

You must go to Him- He is waiting for you!  HE LOVES YOU!  There is nothing you can do, or have done that can change His love towards you.  He sees you as beautiful.  So do it now, like I just did.  Crawl up into His lap- see yourself doing this- image the powerful creator of the universe holding you in His arms right now...and as powerful as He is, He is so gentle and loving as He brushes His nail-scarred hands through your hair.

Then as I laid there, He showed me the deepest, largest root of insecurity that had been burried down in my heart.  Jesus had done a lot of gardening in my life over these last eight years and had been pulling out roots of insecurity, but this one I did not even know was still there, nor did I realize the havac it was beginning to create in my mind.  This one had become a moutain of weight in my life that was beginning to crush my spirit....but as I lay there my amazing Savior not only revieled this root to me, but He also revieled His power to me!
He reminded me of  these verses,
"Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”  Matthew 17:20
And Matthew 21:21, "Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.


I am a child of God, and the same power that raised Christ from the dead lives in me, I am able to cast moutians into the sea and live in FREEDOM!  So I did.  And I was able to freely move again!  I was free to move, free to dance, and free to get up and praise the name of Jesus in this blog post at 4:30 AM!  I know my worth is found in Jesus Christ alone and that allows for the weight of worthlessness to be cast off my shoulders and for me to run forward weightless in Christ confidence!  I pray that right now, whatever mountain you are carrying, you crawl into the merciful lap of Christ and find the strength to cast it out -causing a dance party like no other dance party because you are once again FREE IN JESUS!